Dear Allen

I haven't written you in awhile, but I think about you everyday.  I miss you dearly.  I try to call and check on your parents regularly, but haven't in about 2 weeks so I need to this weekend.  Everyone seems to be doing about the same, so no news is good news.  I haven't spoken to Lee in months.  I've tried and tried and for whatever reason, Lee just doesn't want to talk to me.  I've tried writing, I've tried calling and I've asked your Mom about him and told her to tell him to call me.  I worry that he's going to go down the wrong path again, but with no contact there is nothing I can do.

I miss you so much, and it's still hard to believe your gone.  I catch myself wanting to send you an email or call you.  It doesn't seem real.  You always knew what to say to make me feel better.  I have a friend named Steve, whom I met through Jason believe it or not and he's a great friend.  He truly cares and would do anything to help me and I would do the same for him.  He lives in San Diego with his boyfriend though, although I wish he were closer. He and I have become pretty close in the past 2 years.  I am so grateful for his friendship. He's a Pisces too, so he just gets me which is really cool. I am truly blessed to have him in my life, and it's funny that it came out of my relationship with Jason. Steve has become one of the only people in my life that I can count on.  Our phone conversations mimic our 4 hour marathons!

I wish I could tell you about my new job.  You would be so proud of me.  I finally left the high profile, money machine dental offices that always give me hell to work at a community health center primarily for the gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender community.  I am finally helping people who really need the help, real people.  Not people who have more money than brains, or people who moved here trying to live a lifestyle that they clearly can't afford. I feel like I am making a difference.  I took a major pay cut but the "pay off" is that I finally love my job!   Haven't said that in many, many years.  Even though it still isn't my dream, or what I originally moved here to do, I enjoy it.  I'm hoping that when I catch up on bills, I can get my kit together and start freelancing again. I know your watching over me, and maybe you even helped with the new job.  Yep, probably.  I love you Allen.